Silence is not so golden

Once again I find myself struggling to write blog posts. The drafts are beginning to pile up so I thought I might give it another go. Since I know many of you are checking in here for news of the adoption, let me assure you that there is nothing going on. There continue to be no birth mothers in the pool, so there will either be a last minute baby or we are in for quite a wait.
The wait is turning out to be harder than I imagined it would be. And having so many friends and family who have adopted, I (wrongly) assumed that I was prepared going in. But, like so much in life, waiting for “the call” is one of those things that you can’t prepare for. It is just something that you need to go through to understand.
But, I am trying very hard to keep my focus anywhere but the wait, which has been made simpler by the fact that we are about to head out of town for a couple of weeks to meet up with David’s family in Kauai. We are both looking forward to the trip and keeping our fingers crossed that we will make it through this trip without any major medical incidents.
After Kauai we are home for a few weeks and then we head off to Florida for AgileBits’ annual gathering. This year we are planning on heading out a few day early so we can go to Orlando and visit The Wizarding World of Harry Potter with some friends. As it happens, these friends are also my coworkers, so after overindulging in butterbeer and magic, we will all head over to Ft. Lauderdale to board a ship for a 7 day sail.
The cruise is going to be the first trip we have taken since we entered the adoption pool where we will not be able to immediately head home if we get the call. The decision to go anyway was not an easy one. But everyone keeps telling us that we need to keep living our lives and I am really looking forward to getting to spend some quality time with people I really enjoy.  So in the end we decided the risk was worth it.
Every time I question that decision (which I do often), I just remember my friend Tricia’s advice. When we first started down the adoption road Tricia was one of the first friends I reached out to.  She adopted both of her children and is generally wise in many ways, so she is always worth listening to.  She told me that no matter how long it takes and how many roadblocks and false starts we hit, when it happens, that child who is ultimately placed in our arms is the one meant to be our daughter.
As eager as I am to meet our child, I am trying to be mindful of all that we are able to enjoy during our remaining period of childlessness. That includes a full nights’ sleep, the ability to pop out and do whatever we want with zero forethought and the quality time we have to devote to our cats. That last one is important because it makes me realize just how pissed off our little monsters will be when they cease to be our center of attention. Especially Dancer.