One of the people I saw at Yom Kippur services was my very first bat-mitzvah student. She is now a grown-up, professional woman whom I have come to truly admire. Which is why I am not at all surprised that I am taking her words to heart.
She was one of 3 people who led Neilah, the very last part of Yom Kippur services. Neilah has always been my favorite part of Yom Kippur services, and the only part that I often find myself wishing would last longer. And given that we get to break the fast after Neilah, that is saying a lot. It is the point when my blood sugar is at its lowest and my usual barriers are completely down. My rational brain is quiet for a change, and I am an open and receptive vessel.
It is at this point that my former student spoke of her resolution for the coming year. It was nothing one would expect, like being a better person or giving more to those who have less. It was to make bigger and better mistakes. Her premise is that it is only when we go outside our comfort zones that we grow as human beings. But the greatest risk of pushing one’s own boundaries is the possibility of failure. So, instead of fearing failure she is embracing the opportunity to make bigger and better mistakes. How brave is that?!
Every year, I try to have at least one area in my life where I force myself out of my comfort zone. But, I tend to do it in ways that are relatively safe. For example, playing marimba was a big stretch for me since I had never had a music lesson in my life before I picked up my marimba mallets. Learning to weave was, and continues to be a stretch, albeit one that I really enjoy. And this year, I am hoping to add spinning to my repertoire. Acquiring new skills does stretch my brain and push me out of my comfort zone, but the risks are virtually nil. The worst that could happen is that I waste fiber. The only people who will even know that I made a mistake would be those I choose to tell.
This year, I intend to follow my former student’s example and strive to make bigger mistakes in ways that matter. That means really stretching myself both personally and professionally. And being prepared to fail. Even if the prospect of doing so frightens me.
At the moment, I have no idea where to start. But I intend to give it a great deal of thought. Because if I am going to risk falling flat on my face, it has to be for something that really counts.