Maybe I have been watching too many time travel tv shows, but lately I have been thinking a lot about how seemingly insignificant choices can have significant impacts on the direction one’s life takes. Almost every time I don’t feel like going to a networking meeting or event, I find myself wondering if perhaps this is the event/meeting where I meet that life-changing client, or possibly meet a new friend or have an opportunity to reconnect with a old one.
The same thought process goes through my head when someone reaches out to me to get together for coffee or a meal. I almost always say yes because who knows what will come of a single conversation. I certainly don’t. What I do know is that a single conversation can have unexpected ripple effects that appear further down the road.
I also work fairly hard not to get caught up in “what-ifs.” Mostly because that way lies madness. But sometimes I just can’t help it. When I do look back, I find myself focusing more on the route taken than on the road not traveled.
For example, what if I had moved back to New York when my grandfather died in the mid-nineties and I was offered his apartment? I like thinking about this because I find it very confirming of the choice I did make. If I had moved east at that point, I would never have bought my first house. I still love my first house more than either of the two I have owned since. I love that house less because of the structure itself and more because of the wonderful things that happened to me while living there. The biggest being that it was the house I was living in when David and I first connected. But there are plenty of smaller, happy memories that I also associate with that house.
Admittedly, those were good times, but, I am a firm believer of not living in the past. I prefer to live in the present, with an eye towards the future. My present isn’t perfect, but then again, whose is? Overall, I am fairly content with my life right now. I have great friends, both near and far. I have a good relationship with my brother and his adorably wonderful daughters. I am still able to connect well with my father. I have the flexibility to go east on a fairly regular basis and see family and friends. And here at home, David and I just celebrated our 14th year of marriage.